How can you love a person so much, so genuine, so sweet and
then unlove them suddenly? How can you tell your promises to one another and
broke them again? How can you say you won’t leave, when all you ever did was to
walk away?
Dear Stranger… again,
It’s
done. Just like that, it’s over… again.
You’re
a stranger again, just like that.
I guess it will never work out the way we always wanted and
right here, right now before the clock ticks to nothingness and before I lose
the whole meaning of writing, I’ll never find and will never ask answers from
you, simply because I just thought I don’t need them. There were questions that
don’t need any answers; it’s like a rhetorical question needing a rhetorical
answer.
I just want to go on with my life and by that means, without
you.
Thank you, for leaving a trace that surely I will never
forget. Still, I know, there will be times that I’ll miss you, I’ll remember
you even if I just walk on that stupid lane we used to walked, surely I’ll
remember how you say your dreams or you, confessing your love to me, but surely
it will also remind me, that these things were all in the past, and that’ll
wake me, because hey, I’m in the present.
Thank you, for giving me emotions. Happiness, madness,
loneliness and for a time I feel a blood rush into my veins.
It’s funny how things work out, we used to be friends, best
friends, turned out to be lovers, then strangers, friends and then lovers
again, but you choose to be a stranger again… for a long time, and you suddenly
came back again, then we became lovers again, then back to where we used to be…
being strangers to each other, am I nuts? Maybe I am.
To tell you honestly, it came to my mind that I shouldn’t
regret any single moments I had with you. I guess, it made a part of rebuilding
of who I am, for knowing myself deeply, that without these certain moments,
without these lessons, I wouldn’t be the person I am right now or the person that
I will become. You are like the every person mentioned in a heartbroken or sad song. Thank you for all those countless memories, for the things you shared,
for the laugh, tears you brought into my life, but most of all, for the heartaches
that you gave me.
I am also sorry, for not being the person you used to know. I changed a lot. Maybe a
part of the reason why is because of what happened to us. But I don’t blame you
anymore, this is me right now and you can’t find the old one and to tell you, I
can’t find you too.
Up until now, I don’t know what love
can bring to me, to us. I just got a realization, that when you break up
with people, you also break a part of yourself, you detach from all these
strings that once made you together. It is hard. But you have to accept and move on.
I forgive you anyway, maybe it’s not your fault after all,
for not loving me anymore, for losing the string, for giving up on our always,
maybe that’s just how it goes, cause maybe you’re not the one for me, maybe
you’re just a hundred lesson I should learn back then. And right now,
the only thing that I should take from all of these is to accept the fact that
people come and go and steal your parts and it’s up to you on how to regain
yourself again from that heartache.
No one’s to blame, cause maybe it just how our story goes
right now… but it is not the end. We should continue to walk on and be strong
every day, to learn to love yourself and rebuild your trust. There will be an always
for us, maybe not on the person we used to love, maybe from someone else, who
knows? Love’s a puzzle, cause maybe the person we love doesn’t deserve us.
